…and hello to you….

Hello there my readers. How have the three of you been? LOL Well let me update you on some of the things that have been new with me. I was kind of seeing this guy, but I came to some realizations and I don’t think that I will be seeing him anymore. Oh well, hopefully something will come along. My friend Sarah is moving back to Florida so she no longer works the law firm that I work for. That’s a total bummer too, but I understand where she is coming from on that. Work for me has been busy lately which is good, I guess. It’s better then getting fired LOL


I promise I will try to get better at blogging more often. It might be slow at first, but I will try my hardest! 🙂


5 years…

On this day, 5 years ago, my life changed. Actually, it changed many peoples lives. It was the day my dad died. I was 20 years old. I can still vividly remember that day, and like today it was a Thursday. But I will share with you some about my dad. He was born in Ohio and moved to Tulare when he was in Jr. High. In 1980 he married my mom and in 1982 they had me, followed by my brother in 1984 and my sister in 1992. Dad was always very involved with our lives, whether it be school, or working on cars, or carting us around he was always there. I remember when he used to work graveyard shifts and my brother and I would wait at the end of the street for him to come home in the morning and he would coast the car the 6 or so houses away that we lived and we used to race him home. We always thought that we were so fast because we would beat the car, well I did that same drive down the same street a few years back and the car goes soooo slow LOL but we were kids and thought that we were great! Or when we would go on the over pass on Paige and he would left of the breaks and we would coast down the hill…again GREAT! Or there was the Easter Sunday that we left my Grandparents house and he made me drive on the freeway! It was the first time I ever drove on the freeway and he told me I had to learn sometime. I know he had to think too that if I killed us, at least we were dressed up nice! I am also honored to have his first name as my middle name. Adam Douglas…

There is not a day that goes by that I don’t think about him. I have seen our whole family change in the past five years and I think this has brought us together closer. I live in Atlanta now, my brother lives in Fullerton, Mom and my sister still live in Tulare, but I know that at any given time we are close. I know he is watching us all and is with us always!

I love you dad!


Why is it what you want, you cant have. Whether it’s because he just got out of a relationship and doesn’t want to get right back into on, or because he lives 2400 miles away from you, or because he doesn’t even know that you exist, or because he is already in a relationship! It seems like it’s the story of my life. I also know that I should just wait it out because you never know what will come along, but still.

How is everyone doing? I am doing well here. Just trying to make it through this week without loosing my sanity! I lost two files this week at work, but I found them too! Woo hoo! But it was still stress that I didn’t need!

Other then that nothing exciting is going on in my life! I have been playing some on the weekend with friends and we have been doing Movie Night on Sundays, which is really fun! It’s nice just to hangout before the week gets started and just end the weekend nice!

Well it looks as if my lunch is going to end soon! Talk to you all later!

Labor Day weekend

I hope that everyone had a very productive weekend! Mine was kind of slutty, which was fun!  Well I have to clock back in from lunch so I will fill you all in later!

What an amazing speech!

I have never really been into the whole Democratic National Convention. Or really many policital speeches, but I think that the 2008 DNC has been amazing. Michelle Obama’s and Beau Biden’s speeches touched a place in me that prays to God that change is near.

Actions speak louder then words….

This was taken from Steve over at Frozen Underwear. I copied the straight blog onto my page as well as linking to his! This has been me numerous times!

Actions speak louder than words…

Online interaction between humans brings out the worst in us.

It’s as if the ambiguity of representing yourself electronically is too much for our relatively unevolved psyches to understand and accept. It’s something we’re not taught from our youth, like how we gauge other interaction between people. Such a fluid thing is likely to cause problems.

Much like online interaction brings out the worst in us, it can be related to playing ‘the game’ while dating. The ideas are similar; neither party knows quite what the other is saying, and how things are meant usually are interpreted very differently by the other person.

As we speak, I’m having said issue. I popped online a few minutes ago, more as a distraction than a serious need to speak with anyone. A couple people were online, but only one person, whom I wouldn’t have minded speaking with, sat there ‘Online’, his little green man glowing, welcoming conversation.

I double clicked on his icon, then stopped. I don’t want to appear too needy/forward/irritating to someone who I was just talking to last night, so I should probably just see if he messages me.

A few moments pass. I busy myself with other things, checking messages and dropping a few ‘happy birthday’ messages to people on Facebook. Nothing is happening on the IM front; both our icons glow the happy green, and neither is making the first attempt at a hello.

So I sit there. I don’t really need to talk, but I’m getting a little irritated that he’s not so much as acknowledged my presence.

I look away to do something, and when I look back his status is now set to ‘Away’. Hrm…well, maybe he truly was busy, or had stepped away from his computer. Again, I turn around and work on other things.

After another ten minutes, I’ve decided it’s not really worth my time to sit here when nobody is talking to me. Might as well accomplish the 5000 other things I have to do. So, I set myself to ‘Appear Offline’, and get busy.

A couple minutes later, I notice that he has now gone back online.

This is where the uncertainty seems to be grounded in something more than a vivid imagination. When I’m online, he sets himself away…when I leave, he comes back online.

I try to be reasonable, rational. We really could have had some bad timing, he may have literally stepped away for those few minutes I was online, only to return when I went offline.

But the unlearned side of us, the side that deals with this new set of social interactions, really wonders if I’d just been ignored with such enthusiasm that a friend actually went to great pains to avoid speaking with me.

Of course, there’s no way to prove any of this, to answer the question and put the mind at ease. Everything online is so open ended; we have nothing else to interpret the other’s meaning except the naked words (or silence) that are sent to us. So how are you supposed to take it when a friend completely ignores your existence, simply reversing what you have done in an attempt to appear innocent?

And naturally, one can’t simply flat-out ask them, because you would look absolutely insane, desperate and paranoid. As we all know, I’m only two of those three things.

So I sit here still, he now back online, me still invisible, and I wonder if I’ve been silently slapped in the face, or if I’m just a paranoid egomaniac.

Yes, I know I have too much time on my hands.

Hello my pretties….

How is everyone doing?! I know long time no blog! Things have been crazy in my life lately! I went to California for a week and some change and it was WONDERFUL! I have a gay ol time!  Let me give you the recap….

THURSDAY:Leave for the airport, as I am standing in line for security you will NEVER guess who is in front of me….MY BOSS! So hugs and kisses to the wifie and handshakes to the boss and we get on the tram going to our gates. My boss and I laughed that we might see each other, but really never in a million years would we have met up if we actually had planned it! Had a nice flight to Phoenix but then trouble happens. As we were getting ready to depart to San Diego the plane malfunctions! That’s right people, I thought I was going to die. I really did start making peace with people in my head in case shit did go down! Well little did I know that the people in San Diego waiting for our plane also thought that the plane had gone down! An hour later we were all safe and alive! YAY!!!!

FRIDAY: Friday I hung out with Megan and her Mom. We went to Coronado Island, Balboa Park, Downtown San Diego, the San Diego Mission, ummmm Baja Betty’s and a porn store! It was fun!

SATURDAY: We raised over $10,000 forAlex’s Lemonaid Stand. It was FUN!!

SUNDAY: Megan and I drove to Fullerton. As we were driving up I did take a picture of Camp Pendleton because I was looking for some hot Marine sex! Come on now who are we kidding if I said that I wasn’t! After we got to my brother’s house we all went to lunch and Wal-Mart…lol Then we all got dressed up fancys and went and saw Wicked! It was AMAZING! I sooo can’t wait to see it here in Atlanta! My brother almost made us late because he soo did not know what time the performance started! Thank goodness I looked at the tickets! Then Megan and I made fun of Liza Manelli! HA and we weren’t even drunk!

MONDAY: We went to DISNEYLAND! It was a blast! Megan and I talked about the hot dads, we took pictures (of us not the dads), and I had a dinner date. The date was awesome, until something bad happened. At least I have something to remember him by! lol That reminds me I need to get them back to him!

TUESDAY: I almost died again! We were in the Cal State Fullerton bookstore when a 5.4 earthquake hit! It was NUTS! Mom was SOO ready for my brother to move back to Tulare as soon as it was over! Luckily nothing was damaged at my brother’s house. Then my mom, sister, and I drove to Pismo. That night my friend Amyand I got together and drank and had a good night. We laughed and reminisced and did a video blog for her blogand all that fun stuff! It was sooo good to see here again.

WEDNESDAY: Drove to Tulare after visiting with my Grandparents. It was a drive that I do not miss. There was NOTHING to see. It was just so blah! Made a video that night with a friend too.

THURSDAY: Went and visited my other Grandma and just hung out with the family!

FRIDAY: Had a bbq at my mom’s house. It was nice to see my Aunts and family that came.

SATURDAY: Had tea with my old coworker in Visalia and got caught up with her life. She is prego! YAY! And then Mom and my sister took me to the airport where I flew home.

SUNDAY: My roommate picked me up from the airport and I went home and crashed!

And that my friends was my California trip!